Tento blog je preventivním opatřením proti 1) smazání pevného disku, 2) spláchnutí flashky do záchodu, 3) krádeži, ztrátě nebo požáru, při němž by došlo ke zničení jedinečného šanonu s poznámkami a texty, 4) kombinaci všech předchozích katastrof. Vychází bez jakéhokoli žánrového omezení, a to zcela nevypočitatelně buď v češtině nebo v angličtině.

úterý 14. září 2010

The Bird's Eye View alias short film synopsis

Last year, I was asked to draft three synopses for one of the episodes of Love Berlin - How We Met movie The submission kind of lost in the outer space, so I sincerely hope it only got tacitly rejected. (The emerging (screen)writer's life does go like this - you share your ideas in places where there is a chance they get stolen, because in the five minutes you've got for talking that producer into your brilliant script, there's really no space for copyright clauses, hence, your daily writing, gets interrupted by panic attacks, when you wonder, if that great scene or those spot-on funny dialogues you sweated over, haven't already become part of somebody's cool movie). Nevertheless, here's one of the Love Berlin texts, enjoy reading and if you incidentally are in search for ideas for a short film, let me know - the set is flexible and can be easily transposed into Love Prague or else.

A young couple goes to Berlin for a long weekend to celebrate their engagement. The guy, Ralf, is a banker-type of man, somewhat too serious, bitter and nervous for the girl, Tina, who, on the contrary, is open and charming, with her head up in the clouds.
A limousine is now driving the couple to the Berlin Schönefeld Airport, Terminal C, because Tina’s parents gave the couple an original engagement gift: a sightseeing flight over Berlin! Tina is very excited and drinks lots of champagne. She encourages Ralf to drink too, to relax, because she knows he is scared of flying. But Ralf refuses, he is unpleasant and says, that he is only undergoing this not to offend Tina’s parents - his future in-laws, who are such generous and lovely people, and that he will drink after he is back on earth safely.
At the airport, a tiny plane is already waiting for the couple. As they approach, Tina tries to encourage Ralf and infect him with her enthusiasm, but he barks at her that he is not afraid at all and why the heck does she worry?
A handsome pilot, Thomas, welcomes the couple on board. HE would be such a great match for Tina! -   Why on earth did she choose to get engaged with the painful banker? – we wonder. Thomas explains security: there is obviously no reason to worry, this is a light plane, so even in case the engine burns, the plane can still float back to the airport. Tina laughs, Ralf gets pale.
Plane takes off, sightseeing starts. Thomas points out and talks about all the monuments and sites of Berlin from the birds’ perspective, he is lovely and entertaining. Talking, talking, talking - on the left you see…On the right you see…Unspoken chemistry clearly starts to unroll between Tina and Thomas. Tina is enjoying herself tremendously and drinks more champagne, while Ralf doesn’t even look out much and silently suffers.
The plane makes a turn back to the airport, while Thomas announces a problem: the wheels got stuck. They wouldn’t come out! Ralf panics: he knew it! – He knew that all this trip was one hell of a life-threatening nonsense, a typical idea of Tina’s lunatic parents!  What about the assurances? What about the floating? – Unfortunately, floating doesn’t save us in this case, - Thomas replies dryly. If the wheels won’t come out, they can’t land. Well. At least the couple can enjoy an extra half hour, free of charge, in the air and see more of Berlin! – Thomas adds. He turns back to the city and continues with his sightseeing commentary. On the right you see the Brandenburger Tor for the second time, on the left, there is the National Theater for the third time…
While Tina oscillates between drunken giggles and fear, Ralf is furious and attacks Thomas with more questions: how come he is so calm? Why doesn’t he report an emergency? Thomas is poised and goes on with his commentary. He says that he is sure that the wheels will eventually come out before they run out of fuel. That doesn’t satisfy Ralf, though, and he asks whether there are any parachutes on board. Thomas replies – yes, there are two, for the passengers. Tina immediately worries:  what would the pilot do? Ralf shouts: he doesn’t give a damn about the stupid pilot, who got him into this whole situation! Tina announces that she trusts Thomas and will stay on board, because the wheels will surely come out. Ralf says that she is crazy and that he is not going to risk his life any further just because she is an insane and irresponsible artist and alcoholic. Tina protests. Ralf demands the parachute. Thomas gives it to him, tells him what to pull to open it, and he lets him out of the plane. Tina looks down to see the parachute open and watches Ralf to land slowly into the vast greenery of Tiergarten Park.
Thomas winks, he says – on the right, you see the Potsdamer Platz for the fifth time, then he makes another turn back towards the airport. He pushes some button. The wheels smoothly come out. Tina smiles, she is relieved, perhaps not only because the plane is going to return safely. They land back at Terminal C.
The limousine is driving back to the city, with Tina and Thomas on board, laughing and drinking champagne.
On the left you see Charlottenburg for the eleventh time! – Thomas laughs.

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